2 Minute Clusterfuck

4:10 pm:  We are in the back yard and it is a beautiful day. The sun is shining, and Scarlett is sitting in my lap eating macaroni and cheese. Daisy is playing with a doggy toy. We are watching cute naked Willa playing in the water. It is one of those perfect moments.

4:11 pm: Willa is toddling toward the stairs and does the cutest pee. If you have never seen a naked baby pee, it's like a moment of discovery. Willa looks down and seems to say "Wow! look what I can do!"  Scarlett and I laugh, there is nothing cuter than naked babies taking a pee break. Then it happens! She does a big long poo! I grab Daisy because she cant resist poo. I tell Scarlett to run and get some baby wipes. As Willa is running into the house with poopy on her butt, I plead from across the yard for her to stop. All the while this long poo is hanging out of her butt swinging around.

Willa turns and books it up the stairs and drops the dooky on the deck. I chase after her with the dog in my arms, and see another chunk falling on the carpet as she runs inside the house. I put the dog in the kitchen which has a gate to keep her away from the ewey poo and wisk up Willa as she tried to sit her poopy booty on the carpet.

4:12 pm: All the while, Scalrett comes flying over the other baby gate with baby wipes in hand and the macaroni & cheese flies everywhere. I grab the wipes and clean the kaka off Willa's butt and grab the poo off the floor. I take a breath and notice Kevin left the other baby gate in the kitchen wide open.  This gate keeps the cat food safe. Shoot, I just locked Daisy in the Kitchen!  Daisy is happily chomping away on Fancy Feast. I jump over, grab the dog, too late the cat food is gone which means I get to clean up more runny poo later.

4:13 pm: Kevin walks in the house as I have a naked baby on my hip, mac & cheese all over the floor, poopy baby wipes and a dog with cat food breath.

Amazing how much can happen in 2 minutes!

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