Monday, January 23, 2012

Notes from the Womb - 30 weeks

Welcome to the third trimester!! Yippee Ki Yay Mother #!@*

8 weeks and counting and I am officially ripe and ready to bring life into this world. It sounds beautiful and magical right? The thing is I dont feel ready. I am in denial that this thing has to eventually come out and live with us.

With baby #3 I am prepared to say goodbye to my sweet 16 yoni... Ok more like sweet 34, but I can pretend. I'm lucky because my husband says I shouldn't worry about that, thanks hunny.  I have read that everything shrinks back to its original size but I also don't believe everything I read.  That would be a fricken miracle!

Somehow I still drag my ass to the gym. Mostly so Scarlett gets out and I get a mommy break. I do love the daycare at my gym. Toadal Fitness your my best friend and I owe my sanity to you. 

My body is so full of baby I dont see how it is at all possible for her to grow for 8 + more weeks, I suppose my internal organs aren't really that important. My ribs feel like they are in a vice most of the day, no biggie I almost get used to it.

 I can no longer see my lovely lady bits, which is probably a good thing. The last view I had resembled blue Twinkies, so I am happy to leave this to my imagination. I pretend I look like Jenna Jameson in that department. Did you know she bleaches her butt-hole to make it that pretty pink color?! I know what I want for my birthday...  Luckily I have doubled my blood supply or something like that so orgasms are earth shattering, and I will miss them oh so much once this baby arrives.

My stomach and bladder have had to share their living space which means I pee all the time and cant eat grown up portions anymore. It feels like I am burning the lining off my esophagus from all the heart burn, but at least the end is in sight.

The problem with the end being is sight is just that, I am totally and completely not ready. My life is pretty chaotic and my day is filled with screaming Scarlett fits and sister fights.  I hope that when I pop this puppy out, we will wing it and some how the pieces will fall into place.

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