Nanny 911

Back in the day when we used to have 1 and 2 kids, we would watch Nanny 911 and marvel at parents inabilities to raise well behaved, respectful children. I viewed parenting as black and white. When there is an unacceptable behavior, provide a consequence and always follow through. Easy as pie!

Fast forward to life with 3 kids and I am officially Nanny 911 material. On a typical day in my home you will find Willa our 1 year old sitting on the table, coloring on herself, or eating erasers off pencils.   She never has matching socks or unstained clothes, often avocado in her hair. Her favorite thing to do is grab the dog treats and share them with the dog, gross! You may think, put that shit up! She happens to be an excellent climber.

I am guilty of holding Willa whenever she wants, which is all the time. I have had people say "cant you put her down?"  No I cant, she will cry, heavens forbid.

When the kids are playing in the baby pool I have been known to bring out a bottle of soap and call it bath time. This is ingenious, 3 kids clean at the same time! When they complain about the dirt and grass floating in the pool, I say "deal with it."

Scarlett has a few daily freak-out  fits, yelling screaming things like "I know everything" or "I love daddy more than you" Back in the olden days I would have addressed each fit appropriately, warnings, followed by  a consequence, but I'm just too tired and have too much to do. Positive parenting is for parents who are way cooler and more rested than I am.  I cant believe how much I let her get away with, she walks all over me. I have been guilty of warning "If you do that, no TV for the rest of the day"   20 minutes later she has turned on  the TV and is parked on the couch.  I figure, at least she is quiet.

I often will be out and about with the kids and notice no one but me is wearing shoes and wonder, did anyone brush their teeth today?  Then I notice the rats nest in Scarlett's hair and cant remember the last time I untangled those unruly curls.

Ava is the only one that actually does what she is supposed to you, we did all our awesome parenting on her and then ran out of juice as the years went by.  Sometimes I look at my life and just have to laugh at the craziness of it all.  I wonder how in the hell did my organized, tight ship turn into a crazy episode of Nanny 911?





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